Proactive change is a fascinating thing. It’s the type of change you seek when you desire a shift in your life. You might have identified an area you want to improve, a behavior you want to stop, or a wish you want to manifest. You are ready for a transformation but may feel overwhelmed with where to begin or what to focus on. Change is possible through desire, small steps, and support.

This week, I attended the educationally stimulating ICD Virtual Conference, “Shining a Spotlight on ADHD.” There were three terrific speakers- Melanie Sobocinski, PhD, PCC, Sharon Saline, Psy.D, and Ari Tuckman, PsyD, MBA. They shared a wealth of information. I’m focusing on three ideas I learned about change that I thought would be especially helpful.

3 Useful Changes

1. Task Activation

Have you ever wondered why a task isn’t happening? In Melanie Sobocinski’s presentation, Mastering the ADHD Trifecta to Manage Task Salience, she said the key to activation hinges on using strategies in three areas:

• High Interest – May need to be boosted or toned down

• Urgency – Can be overused, but can be beneficial when used in small doses

• Other People – Can provide support, including focus and problem-solving, or can be an obstacle if it erodes the client’s autonomy

Task activation can be improved by understanding which elements are interfering. While Melanie shared excellent strategies for each area, there was one for High Interest that caught my attention.

To boost “Interest,” you can introduce novelty with a micro-change. Melanie shared a worksheet by Casey Dixon, PCC, who defines micro-change as “the smallest possible change you can make to have a task or solution feel new again.” These tiny changes will “catch your brain’s attention and help a task feel fresher and more rewarding, without creating utter chaos.”

Use Micro-Change to Introduce Novelty

• Try a new tool or resource, such as a new app.

• Change your location or placement of objects, like working at a coffee shop.

• Select a new color for writing with or on.

• Use a new sound for alarms.

• Adjust your position or lighting by walking during a call or switching the lighting intensity.

2. Confidence Formation

Have you ever felt nervous, anxious, or lacked confidence in social situations? Are you curious about one strategy that can change your experience? In Sharon Saline’s presentation, Strategies and Solutions for Social Anxiety in Neurodivergent Adults, she described social anxiety disorder as a “debilitating fear or judgment, humiliation, or rejection.” There can be a “disconnect between how a person actually appears to others and their own exaggerated perception of themselves.”

Sharon delved into Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), Perfectionism, and Imposter Syndrome. One of the strategies she offered when discussing Imposter Syndrome was to develop and name your “inner ally.” Negative self-talk can run rampant. Call upon your inner ally to provide support, compassion, and belief when you’re feeling nervous, doubtful, or ruminating with unhelpful thoughts. Sharon calls her ally “Tina Trailblazer.” What name will you give yours? What words of support will they offer?

While I haven’t named my ally or identified her as such, I have relied this year on my 2024 motto to lift me when I run into a challenge. Her voice says, “You got this.” Those words help me get over myself and move forward with confidence. After learning about the inner ally concept, I feel inspired to give my ally a name.

“Yes starts the process of change; Yet keeps it going.”

— Sharon Saline, Psy.D.

3. Sleep Foundation

Do you get enough sleep? Is that an area of your life you want to change and improve? Ari Tucker’s presentation was ADHD Makes Sleep Worse – And We Probably All Need More Sleep. He said, “No one is bringing their A-game after a bad night of sleep.”  

Lack of sleep negatively impacts mood, efficiency, effectiveness, focus, and attention. Consider how you feel after good or bad sleep days. There are many solutions for sleep deprivation, which include establishing a consistent bedtime, limiting caffeine, minimizing kid and pet disruptions, or stopping naps. For more strategies, read Ari’s ADDitude article, 9 Sleep Deprivation Solutions for Adults with ADHD.

While there are numerous ways to address good sleep hygiene, Ari suggests focusing first on quantity. If you establish the ‘right’ number of sleep hours you need, the quality of your sleep will probably be fine. If the quantity of sleep is good and you’re still having sleep challenges, then it’s worth investigating your sleep quality. Talking with a doctor who can advise about any medical challenges affecting your sleep could be beneficial.

Small changes in your sleep habits can significantly improve your daily experience.  

“Partial progress is still progress.”

— Ari Tuckman, Psy.D.

Which ideas resonated with you? Are there areas of change you want to focus on? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

If you want guidance with the changes you desire, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is doable, especially with support.

The newest installment (v34) of the “What’s Interesting?” feature has my latest finds informing, educating, and relating to organizing and life balance. These are unique, inspiring, next-step-related discoveries that reflect this month’s blog theme. 

You are a generous, communicative, and engaged group. I am deeply grateful for your presence, positive energy, and contributions to this community. I look forward to your participation and additions to the collection I’ve sourced.

What do you find interesting?

What’s Interesting? – 5 Best Next Step-Related Discoveries

1. Interesting Read – Positive Self-Talk Next

Is the voice in your head your biggest cheerleader or harshest critic? Does it guide you forward or prevent you from figuring out next? In Chatter – The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It, psychologist Ethan Kross shares strategies based on behavioral and brain research. He helps us understand how to quiet the negative self-talk and create a positive internal conversation. Kross says, “…when the inner voice runs amok and chatter takes the mental microphone, our mind not only torments but paralyzes us.”

Kross provides a few dozen tools for “helping people resolve the tension between getting caught in negative thought spirals and thinking clearly and constructively.” They include engaging in mental time travel, changing the view, writing expressively, creating a board of advisors, seeking awe-inspiring experiences, and increasing exposure to green spaces.

One strategy that especially resonated with me is creating order in your environment. Helping clients get organized for almost 30 years, I’ve seen the positive benefits of calming the internal chatter when the external environment is organized. Kross says, “Find your own way of organizing your space to help provide you with a sense of mental order.”

2. Interesting Assessment – Get Unstuck Next

Let’s face it. Universally, we all get stuck at some point. It can be challenging to figure out the next step when that happens. Be stuck no more. I created this handy, custom-designed Get Unstuck Wheel, and you can spin your way forward. Discover the strategy that works best for you. There are 36 ideas to try, including taking deep breaths, sleeping on it, reaching out for support, and switching gears. What helps you get unstuck? Did you spin the wheel? If so, where did it land?

“Take the smallest, tiniest next step.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO

3. Interesting Article  – Perfectionism Insights Next

Do you or someone you know have perfectionist tendencies? If you want to struggle less, read Ashley Broadwater’s HuffPost article, “There Are 3 Types of Perfectionism. Which Category Are You?” Broadwater describes each type and some helpful coping strategies. Therapist Emily Simonian encourages her clients to focus on small, next steps. She said, “A perfectionist of any type will likely want a ‘big win’ quickly if trying to recover from perfectionism, but baby steps are key. … [Recovery] is very much attainable with practice.”

• Self-oriented perfection – You expect the best from and are extremely hard on yourself. Practicing self-care and self-compassion can help.

• Other-oriented perfectionism – You expect others to be a certain way and become upset when they don’t meet your expectations. Practicing gratitude and mindfulness is beneficial.

• Socially prescribed perfectionism – You rely heavily on others’ thoughts about how you act or look and fear rejection. Strengthening your positive inner voice will help. This could be an excellent time to read Chatter (see #1 above.) 

4. Interesting Season – Get Organized Next

As color returns to the landscape, daylight lasts longer, and temperature becomes warmer; this is an inspirational time of year. Spring is a wonderful season to set your organizing goals, declutter the extraneous, and create the calm you deserve. Change is possible, especially with support. Struggle no more. Enlist help from a compassionate and non-judgmental friend, family member, or professional organizer like me. I’m here to help. Discover the benefits of virtual organizing and why my clients love it so much. Call 914-271-5673, email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, or click the “Let’s talk!” button to schedule a discovery call. 

5. Interesting Thought – One Small Step Next

You want to declutter and organize your entire house, redo your filing and paper management systems, organize all of your photos and visual media, or change your organizing habits. However, these projects feel so large and overwhelming that you keep them as thoughts in your mind. No action gets taken because you feel stuck. It’s good to have the entire picture in your mind for what you want to achieve. However, you don’t have to know the whole plan. Take the smallest, tiniest next step. That is enough. Once that step is taken, acknowledge your progress and repeat the process. Continue taking action one little step at a time. 

What are your interesting, next step discoveries? Which of these resonate with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

As we wind down one heck of a year, many of us reflect on the past twelve months and the year that is about to start. 2020 has been full of intense emotions and experiences, along with amazing conversations we’ve shared together on the blog. We’ve walked side-by-side as we’ve navigated turbulent waters, made discoveries and wrestled with life balance. In our free-flowing exchanges, insights and new perspectives emerged.

Our conversations about life balance, change, mindfulness, clutter, letting go, motivation, organizing, coping, resilience, hope, pandemics, and more have provided immense comfort, connection, and joy. Thank you for being part of this generous community. You inspire me to show up, write, think, explore, and engage.

I am deeply grateful for the thoughtful words and beautiful sharing of this community. I’ve curated twelve of my favorite quotes of the year from my top engagers, selecting one from each month and topic. Thank you, Deb Lee, Diane Quintana, Ellen Delap, Janet Barclay, Janet Schiesl, Julie Bestry, Melissa Gratias, Nancy Haworth, Ronni Eisenberg, Sabrina Quairoli, Seana Turner, and Yota Schneider. You are the consistent voices and readers that bring our conversations to life. My gratitude to you and everyone who reads the blog, contributes to our discussions, or shares the posts. You bring hope, light, curiosity, perspective, and learning to each day.

Enjoy the year in review- one quote, insight, and inspiration at a time!

12 Best Quotes From Our Conversations This Year That Will Make You Inspired

1. Fresh Start - How a Simple Change in Perspective Can Spark Your Fresh Start

“. . . sometimes a slight change can encourage a fresh start. Whenever I’m feeling stagnant, I will change location, for example, working from a different coffee shop or running on a different trail. Just a location change from my normal routine can sometimes help me get out of feeling stuck.”

— Nancy Haworth, Certified Professional Organizer

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2. Embrace Change - 7 Valuable Lessons I Learned About How to Navigate a Big Change

“Change is inevitable, whether we like it or not . . . Gathering a support system is critical for navigating change and situations that are less than comfortable. It doesn’t matter if it’s brainstorming, consulting, or comforting; we all need a team to help us move forward.”

— Ronni Eisenberg, Professional Organizer & Author

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3. Next Step - How to Cope With Your Anxiety That Accompanies Next

“Every day, we’ll have to approach things with discernment. What can I reasonably do now to keep myself calm and focus on the true priorities? What must I put aside (anxiety? fear? perfectionism?) to get through this moment so I can be present for the next one?”

— Julie Bestry, Certified Professional Organizer

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4. Letting Go - How to Know When It’s Time to Let Go of the ‘Shoulds’

“I’m spending a little too much time ruminating and over-thinking past events. The words that float through my brain are ‘If only I’d had the wisdom to ... I would have ...’ I know it’s not possible to change the past and that all I have is now. I’m giving myself the grace to live in the present.”

— Diane Quintana, Productivity and Organizing Expert

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5. Clutter - 5 Authentic Ways to Declutter Your Life

“Authentic decluttering for me is letting go of the item as soon as I know it has served me well. That is the case for any item. I release it sooner rather than later.”

— Ellen Delap, Certified Professional Organizer

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6. Time Management - 5 Ways to Take Time for Delight Especially With Life is Hard 

“I have had to redefine ‘delight’ this year, and it has been an excellent exercise for me. I have taken better care of my physical and mental health, savored the small moments that may have eluded me before, and learned the joy of ‘time affluence.’ I feel that I will be a different (better) person for having had this experience.”

— Melissa Gratias,Ph.D., Productivity Coach

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7. Motivation - One Powerful Strategy for When You Can’t Get Motivated 

“. . . when I can’t focus on something, I start by doing small steps that are in the process. Sometimes steps do not have to be in order when completing. Randomization is OK if you are still working toward your goal.”

— Sabrina Quairoli, Small Business Administrator

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8. Enlisting Help - How to Know If Virtual Organizing Will Benefit You

“Virtual organizing can be a great way to keep the momentum going. It keeps you in touch with your organizer and moves you forward even when you’re pressed for time.”

— Deb Lee, Digital Productivity Consultant

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9. Mindfulness - How to Make a Wonderful Discovery in a Mindful Moment

“One thing I’ve noticed about noticing is that I never do it when I am in a hurry. Hurry and mindfulness seem to be at odds with one another. If I want to notice, I need to slow down.”

— Seana Turner, Professional Organizer

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10. Possibilities - How to Be Open to the Tremendous Possibilities Wonderful Change Encourages

“I love this sentiment. Holding on to change is so much more positive than letting things go.”

— Janet Schiesl, Certified Professional Organizer

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11. Wonderfully Human - How to Increase Your Resilience When You Are Feeling Humanly Depleted

“These days we’re asked to dance in all kinds of weather, aren’t we? We have to start where we are, do what we can, and build our reserves of resilience and joy. For me, it’s always been the little things. Moments of beauty and peace strung together through the day that keeps me grounded and inspired.”

— Yota Schneider, Life Coach & Retreat Leader

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12. Life Balance - How to Effectively Balance the Extremes of Your Holiday Season

“We’ll be doing everything virtually this year, and I’m grateful we have that option. Although it definitely won’t be the same, it will probably be a lot more relaxing than the years when we rushed from one house to another to fit in all the visits!”

— Janet Barclay, Website Designer

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These quotes were taken from the lively dialogue we had on the blog this year. What resonates with you? Is there one idea you’d like to bring forward into the New Year? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

We’ve all heard the saying, “If it ain’t broke, don't fix it.”  That goes along the same line of thinking as something being good enough. If it is good enough, is it worth disrupting to make it better?

However, what if something is broken? Is it worth fixing? Broken can include things that no longer work like that DVD player, missing pieces to a game, or favorite a sweater that is well (really well) worn. It can even include negative relationships that only bring angst.

There is also the proactive approach like Gerald Nadler’s. His philosophy describing breakthrough thinkers is,

“Fix it before it breaks.”

Of course, that isn’t always possible.

Our decisions and their effectiveness are based on the quality of the questions we ask. This is true while we’re going through the organizing process, when we’re making big life decisions, or when we’re navigating relationships. So what are the possibilities between good enough and broken? How do we weigh them? How do we know which path to take?

Just to be clear, I’m not advocating that we live our lives without striving. It’s a matter of selecting where our effort gets invested. There are times when good enough is enough and when broken things don’t need to be fixed. Being able to identify those situations can be freeing because it gives us the space to focus on what we feel is most important and meaningful.

I’ve put together a list of questions to get you started. There are no value judgments here. This is simply a guide to help you with decision-making. It can be applied to many different situations. I’m sure that you will think of other questions to add to the list. I welcome your ideas and additions. Please include them in the comment section at the end of the post.

How do we weigh the possibilities between good enough and broken? 

Questions to Ask When Things Are Good Enough . . .

• What will I gain from changing what’s good enough?
• Do I want to make those changes because I’m not satisfied with good enough?
• Do I have the time to invest in making things better than they already are?
• Do I have the motivation to make improvements?
• Instead of fixing what’s good enough, are there other things/situations/people that could benefit more from my attention?
• Where does my desire to improve things originate?
• Is perfectionism involved?
• What are my thoughts about good enough?
• Does the phrase continual improvement resonate with me?
• How does continual improvement relate to good enough?

Questions to Ask When Things Are Broken . . .

• Is it worth fixing?
• If so, why?
• How long has it been broken?
• What would happen if I let it go?
• Is there a value in repairing it?
• Is it worth the time, energy, and resources (financial and/or emotional) to fix it?
• What if I don’t know how to fix it or where to start?
• Would it be more cost effective, time efficient, or less stressful to start with something new, rather then to repair what’s broken?
• What old habits and behaviors might be preventing me from letting go?
• Do I want to invest my time in fixing what’s broken?
• Do I want invest my energy elsewhere?

As we enter this new season, revisit the things in your life that are just right, need fixing, require letting go, or beg for more attention and focus. You’ll find the answers in the questions you ask. Possibilities are waiting. What are you noticing? I’d love to hear your thoughts along with any questions you’d like to add to the lists. Come join the conversation!