Proactive change is a fascinating thing. It’s the type of change you seek when you desire a shift in your life. You might have identified an area you want to improve, a behavior you want to stop, or a wish you want to manifest. You are ready for a transformation but may feel overwhelmed with where to begin or what to focus on. Change is possible through desire, small steps, and support.

This week, I attended the educationally stimulating ICD Virtual Conference, “Shining a Spotlight on ADHD.” There were three terrific speakers- Melanie Sobocinski, PhD, PCC, Sharon Saline, Psy.D, and Ari Tuckman, PsyD, MBA. They shared a wealth of information. I’m focusing on three ideas I learned about change that I thought would be especially helpful.

3 Useful Changes

1. Task Activation

Have you ever wondered why a task isn’t happening? In Melanie Sobocinski’s presentation, Mastering the ADHD Trifecta to Manage Task Salience, she said the key to activation hinges on using strategies in three areas:

• High Interest – May need to be boosted or toned down

• Urgency – Can be overused, but can be beneficial when used in small doses

• Other People – Can provide support, including focus and problem-solving, or can be an obstacle if it erodes the client’s autonomy

Task activation can be improved by understanding which elements are interfering. While Melanie shared excellent strategies for each area, there was one for High Interest that caught my attention.

To boost “Interest,” you can introduce novelty with a micro-change. Melanie shared a worksheet by Casey Dixon, PCC, who defines micro-change as “the smallest possible change you can make to have a task or solution feel new again.” These tiny changes will “catch your brain’s attention and help a task feel fresher and more rewarding, without creating utter chaos.”

Use Micro-Change to Introduce Novelty

• Try a new tool or resource, such as a new app.

• Change your location or placement of objects, like working at a coffee shop.

• Select a new color for writing with or on.

• Use a new sound for alarms.

• Adjust your position or lighting by walking during a call or switching the lighting intensity.

2. Confidence Formation

Have you ever felt nervous, anxious, or lacked confidence in social situations? Are you curious about one strategy that can change your experience? In Sharon Saline’s presentation, Strategies and Solutions for Social Anxiety in Neurodivergent Adults, she described social anxiety disorder as a “debilitating fear or judgment, humiliation, or rejection.” There can be a “disconnect between how a person actually appears to others and their own exaggerated perception of themselves.”

Sharon delved into Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), Perfectionism, and Imposter Syndrome. One of the strategies she offered when discussing Imposter Syndrome was to develop and name your “inner ally.” Negative self-talk can run rampant. Call upon your inner ally to provide support, compassion, and belief when you’re feeling nervous, doubtful, or ruminating with unhelpful thoughts. Sharon calls her ally “Tina Trailblazer.” What name will you give yours? What words of support will they offer?

While I haven’t named my ally or identified her as such, I have relied this year on my 2024 motto to lift me when I run into a challenge. Her voice says, “You got this.” Those words help me get over myself and move forward with confidence. After learning about the inner ally concept, I feel inspired to give my ally a name.

“Yes starts the process of change; Yet keeps it going.”

— Sharon Saline, Psy.D.

3. Sleep Foundation

Do you get enough sleep? Is that an area of your life you want to change and improve? Ari Tucker’s presentation was ADHD Makes Sleep Worse – And We Probably All Need More Sleep. He said, “No one is bringing their A-game after a bad night of sleep.”  

Lack of sleep negatively impacts mood, efficiency, effectiveness, focus, and attention. Consider how you feel after good or bad sleep days. There are many solutions for sleep deprivation, which include establishing a consistent bedtime, limiting caffeine, minimizing kid and pet disruptions, or stopping naps. For more strategies, read Ari’s ADDitude article, 9 Sleep Deprivation Solutions for Adults with ADHD.

While there are numerous ways to address good sleep hygiene, Ari suggests focusing first on quantity. If you establish the ‘right’ number of sleep hours you need, the quality of your sleep will probably be fine. If the quantity of sleep is good and you’re still having sleep challenges, then it’s worth investigating your sleep quality. Talking with a doctor who can advise about any medical challenges affecting your sleep could be beneficial.

Small changes in your sleep habits can significantly improve your daily experience.  

“Partial progress is still progress.”

— Ari Tuckman, Psy.D.

Which ideas resonated with you? Are there areas of change you want to focus on? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

If you want guidance with the changes you desire, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is doable, especially with support.

When you’re making a significant change, it takes sustained energy and focus. This can be exhausting. When pursuing change, motivation is an essential ingredient. However, it’s not enough. Sometimes, you’ll need to act even when you don’t feel like it and your motivation is low or non-existent.

Taking action through small, consistent steps will facilitate the change you desire.

There is another aspect to proactive change that goes beyond desire, motivation, and action. It’s recognizing the powerful and energizing effect a brief pause has.

Last week, I wrote about capacity. The pause is connected to that idea. Consider how much stamina it takes to make a change in your life. Along that journey, which could take days, months, or years, the endurance needed won’t be sustainable without rest cycles.

Clients’ Organizing Goals

I admire my clients’ dedication to pursuing their organizational goals and making changes in their lives. There are weeks when things flow easily for them. At other times, it’s more challenging to activate and move forward. They don’t give up. I support them as they navigate the change process. They balance the intense periods of action with taking breaks. They’ll step away briefly and then return.

The power of their pause is noticeable. After their hiatus, clarity, energy, and determination return. The downtime creates space to breathe, rejuvenate, and refocus.

My Big Changes

You may recall how the pandemic influenced significant changes for my organizing business, Oh, So Organized! In 2020, after almost thirty years of working in-person with clients, I pivoted to offer virtual services only. My organizing company helps overwhelmed individuals challenged by disorganization get unstuck and organized with nonjudgmental, personalized one-on-one sessions, workshops, and publications.

I’ve led workshops for decades. Most of those were hosted by other companies or industry associations. However, in 2022, I started sponsoring my own workshops. I’ve hosted four since then and plan to offer two more this year. It’s been a positive change that I’m still exploring.

In the first quarter of 2024, I had four workshops scheduled, one of which I hosted. I’ve already given three and was invited to present next month for Denise Wenacur’s Design Lab. These changes have been exciting yet intense because of the deadlines.

“To sustain the pursuit of the changes you seek, step away from doing to recharge.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

A Gentle Pause

Do you remember I mentioned how my clients balance their change pursuits with taking breaks? Well, I’m no different. I integrate breaks, too. And luckily, in the last few weeks, we’ve had some beautiful snowfall in the Hudson Valley. You may wonder how snow and pausing connect.

These particular snows were incredibly peaceful, covering the landscape in white and making the quiet feel even quieter. I loved pausing to watch the snow steadily fall to the ground. It was meditative and made me feel calm and relaxed. Watching the gently floating snowflakes encouraged me to appreciate the moment and temporarily disengage from my projects. Observing was enough of a break to help me reset, energize, and prepare for the next step.

Weird Facts shared this idea about the quiet a fresh snow brings:

“Fresh snow absorbs sound, lowering ambient noise over a landscape because the trapped air between snowflakes attenuates vibration. That’s why it gets so quiet when it snows.”

Don’t underestimate the power of a pause. To sustain the pursuit of the changes you seek, step away from doing to recharge. Pause and see the snow descend, take a coffee break, or go away for a few days. You’ll be happy you did.

What type of pause benefits you? How does it help you pursue the changes you want?

Help is Here

If you are in the midst of change and want assistance, I’m here to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is doable, especially with support.

What is your relationship to change? Do you love change and readily seek it out? Or do you avoid change at all costs? It may depend on the situation. Your feelings about change are influenced by your capacity at any given moment. When you are stressed, overwhelmed, and with no energy or motivation, your capacity for change is low. However, when you’re excited and ready, even if you don’t have all the facts or steps, you have more capacity to seek changes and new opportunities.

It's important to know where you are and what you need. The outcome won’t be great if you try to make a significant change when you’re sleep-deprived and can’t think straight. At those times, instead of pushing beyond your capacity, it’s best to pull back and support what you need. That might mean more sleep, some quiet, or a walk outside.

When you’re ready to stretch and grow, pushing beyond your capacity will be possible. You can do things you’ve never done. This will require physical and emotional energy and mental toughness to stretch past your comfort zone.

“Your feelings about change are influenced by your capacity at any given moment. ”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

Monthly Sharing Retreat

Each month, I participate in a fantastic virtual retreat led by my wonderful friend and Clarity Coach, Yota Schneider. She creates a safe, supportive space for women to gather, meditate, write, and share.

On a recent retreat, the theme was capacity. I wrote this passage in my journal during our free-write after the meditation, which I’m sharing with you. The more I thought about it, the more I realized how intertwined capacity is with your ability for change.

Thoughts About Capacity

One thing is for sure. My mind has the capacity to go on in a bazillion directions thinking about capacity. Knowing that, I will take one of the tangents and go with it.

Milk Bottles

I thought about a bottle. I was filling up a bottle, like those old rectangular glass milk bottles delivered to the back kitchen door when I was a kid. As I filled up this bottle with clear liquid, guess what? There was a point when it was to the top, and then, in a moment, it was spilling over. To full, overflowing, beyond capacity. What a mess!

Conferences

Next thought. I thought about a professional conference I went to. It was jam-packed with three days of learning. Experts spoke about the brain, learning differences, chronic disorganization, and more. The presenters taught us for six to eight hours each day. Between learning and socializing, my brain was too full by the end of the day. I couldn’t think or formulate a coherent sentence. My intake for the night was beyond capacity. I felt like a soaked sponge that couldn’t absorb another drop. I knew it was time to retreat to the quiet of my hotel room.

Flaco

And lastly, there’s Flaco. He is a giant Eurasian owl born in captivity to parents who also were. He lived in New York City’s Central Park Zoo for over a decade. Then, one night, someone broke into his cage, and he escaped. However, because he was born in captivity, Flaco never learned to hunt or fend for himself. He could barely fly. His capacity was contained.

After his escape, incredible things happened. He became a fascination and inspiration to New Yorkers. One man has been documenting Flaco’s adventures this past year. Flaco, who has a six-foot wingspan, can now fly. He’s a fantastic hunger and can be spotted on tops of buildings or park benches. He stretched beyond his capacity and thrived. Who says owls can’t change?

Milk bottles, conferences, and giant owls. Sometimes, we feel limited by our capacity and must stop or retreat. At other times, we feel inspired to soar to new heights.

Knowing and honoring your capacity for both is the kindest gift you can give. Know when it’s necessary to pull back. Know when it’s time to reach beyond.

Flaco the Owl | Late Night with Seth Meyers

Your Capacity for Change

Locate yourself on the change-capacity scale. Is it time to step back or extend?

If you want assistance aligning your capacity with your change goals, I’d love to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is possible, especially with support.

You might wonder how baking cookies relate to encouraging change or getting organized. At first glance, they may seem unrelated. However, a funny thing happened recently, which is how I made the connection. I tested out a new cookie recipe from Amy Bowers, my friend who is a Health Coach. To ensure the best outcome, I used the specific ingredients she recommended, including almond butter, coconut sugar, and my favorite, dark chocolate chips.

A successful change journey also requires distinct ingredients. One, in particular, is crucial.

Essential Ingredient to Encourage Change

There are different types of change. Some changes we proactively seek, and some changes happen unexpectedly. There is an ingredient that is valuable for both. Successful change hinges on your choices and the decisions that follow.

Choice and decisions are not one but two things. However, I see them as a connected unit, so I’m offering them as one helpful ingredient.

When you seek change, you desire something different. You may want to establish a new habit, create more organization, or design your next stage of life. Desiring is one thing. That aspect is crucial because it provides your motivation and why. But desire alone isn’t enough.

To encourage actual change, you have many choices. Recognizing those choices is crucial. Identifying them is the thought part. Pairing a choice with a decision is the action part. A dynamic choice-decision-making cycle is vital for change to occur.

The Ingredients Of Practice

Let’s return to my cookie-baking analogy.

The choices went something like this:

• Is this recipe enticing enough to test, or not?

• Is it a recipe I can make on my own, or not?

• Do I have the ingredients, or will I have to buy some?

• Do I have the time to bake the recipe today or sometime in the future?

Nothing would have changed if I stopped after asking those questions and didn’t move on to the decision-making phase. There would have been no baking, cookies, or new favorite recipes. However, curiosity led me to continue. I couldn’t stop thinking about the enticing cookie photo Amy posted on Instagram.

The decision-making cycle looked like this:

• I carefully read the recipe and determined it was easy and well within my baking skills.

• I had most, but not all, of the ingredients.

• I looked at the time needed. It included going to the grocery store for the items I didn’t have, assembling the ingredients, and baking. I had the interest, ability, and time to test the recipe that day.

The cookies were baked, and they were incredibly delicious. They were so yummy that it was challenging to stop eating them. That’s a story for another day. If you want the recipe, email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, and I’ll happily share it, or you can see Amy’s post for the details.

“Successful change hinges on your choices and the decisions that follow.”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

The Change You Seek

We’re in the second month of this new year. What changes are you working on? How are they going? Are you noticing your choices, making decisions, and taking action? Are you moving forward on your own or enlisting help?

Change happens when you repeatedly identify the choices, make decisions, and take action. You can bring about the change you crave through questioning, doing, readjusting, and staying curious.

If you want assistance with any part of the change process, I’d love to help. Please email me at linda@ohsoorganized.com, call 914-271-5673, or click here to schedule a Discovery Call. Change is possible, especially with support.