Posts tagged comfort zone
How to Joyfully Grow and Thrive When Life Feels Like Complete Chaos

When the world within and around you is drenched in chaos, how can you thrive? Humans are complicated beings. We can simultaneously hold profoundly opposite ideas, emotions, and thoughts. We can experience love and safety when wrapped in our loved one’s embrace. We can also experience intense pain when we hear news about wars, hate, displacement, and heartache. The hard stuff can weigh so heavily on you that it can feel impossible to thrive. You might even feel guilty about experiencing joy when there is so much suffering.

Several years ago, I listened to a conversation about opening and cultivating the human heart with Frank Ostaseki, co-founder of The Zen Hospice Project, and Roshi Joan Halifax, Ph.D., Buddhist teacher and Founder of Upaya Zen Center. One of the ideas that resonated with me then and even more now is that hope is essential, especially in a “time of radical uncertainty.” Hope is not about “sappy positivity,” bypassing the truth of suffering, or thinking that everything will be OK.

 

Thoughts About Hope

During the conversation, Ostaseki and Halifax shared their perspectives about hope:

  • Hope helps us go beyond the rational.

  • Hope can be the flip side of fear.

  • Hope is not based on optimism.

  • Hope is a surprise. It’s light and buoyant and not about a particular outcome.

  • Hope reflects an understanding that what we do matters, even though we don’t know how, why, who it will touch, or what will unfold from our actions.

  • Hope is resistant to futility.

  • Hope resides in resourcefulness.

  • Hope speaks to possibilities.

While you might feel powerless to change the world, you can make your corner more joyous and hope-filled.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

31 Ways to Thrive and Feel Joyful During Chaotic Times

Having hope contributes to being able to thrive. Without it, we give up. Take an active role in cultivating hope. Nourish yourself and others, and create a solid base to grow from. During chaotic times, there are so many things that seem futile. Instead, focus on engaging in simple actions or observations in your control. Hope will grow from there. Consider:

  • Watching the fall leaves gently float to the ground

  • Taking a walk along the river with a good friend

  • Getting a good night’s sleep

  • Eating a nutritious and delicious meal

  • Feeling the warm sun on your face

  • Hugging your loved ones

  • Reading or listening to uplifting books, articles, and podcasts

  • Planning something you will look forward to doing

  • Taking a road trip, even a local one

  • Brewing and slowly sipping a hot cup of tea

  • Curling up on the sofa, wrapped in your favorite soft, cozy blanket

  • Learning something new

  • Listening to your favorite music

  • Practicing mindfulness meditation

  • Organizing that one room that is ready to be tamed

  • Helping something to grow

  • Focusing on the inhale and exhale of your breath

  • Making something with your hands

  • Pausing in the middle of your day to regroup and reset

  • Listening to the sounds of laughter

  • Laughing

  • Writing in your journal

  • Smiling at a stranger

  • Having a ‘do nothing’ day

  • Checking in by phone, email, text, or in person on your loved ones

  • Doing something outside of your comfort zone

  • Helping a client set boundaries, establish priorities, and get unstuck

  • Noting what you are grateful for

  • Offering compassion and kindness to someone you do or don’t know

  • Refusing to give up

  • Listening to your intuition


Life is a mixture of joy, pain, and everything in between. As humans, we know this is true. Yet even so, it can be challenging to navigate the sadness when your life and the world feel so chaotic and unhinged. While you might feel powerless to change the world, you can make your corner more joyous and hope-filled. You never know how your actions or words will uplift someone else. Be gentle with yourself and others. Nourish your being to have the energy to extend more kindness and compassion to yourself and others.

What helps you thrive during challenging times? What brings you hope? How do you make your ‘corner’ better? I’d love to hear your thoughts and invite you to join the conversation.

 
Here Are Today's Interesting and Best Change-Related Discoveries - v39

The newest release (v39) of the “What’s Interesting?” feature has my latest finds, which inform, educate, and relate to organizing and life balance. These unique, inspiring, embracing change discoveries reflect this month’s blog theme.

You are a generous, communicative, and engaged group. I am deeply grateful for your ongoing presence, positive energy, and contributions to this community. I look forward to your participation and additions to the collection I’ve sourced.

What do you find interesting?

 









What’s Interesting? – 5 Best Embracing Change Discoveries

1. Interesting Read – Life Change

Do you want more happiness in your life? In The Fun Habit – How the Pursuit of Joy and Wonder Can Change Your Life, behavioral scientist, organizational psychologist, and author Mike Rucker, Ph.D., shares how happiness is a state of mind which can feel elusive and dependent upon your circumstance. Yet fun is action-oriented and something within your control. He says, “In contrast to happiness, I’ve come to learn fun is less think and more do. You’re either having fun or you’re not.”

Backed by research and personal experiences, Mike shares ways to be intentional about fun. While he is not opposed to striving, he says, “instead of auditing your calendar for productivity, audit it for fun.” Use the PLAY model to identify and sort activities based on their level of challenge and degree of fun. Create your “fun file” to document and prioritize your fun habit. This book is for you if you’re ready to change and add more delight to your life. Mike says, “We don’t get through life without enduring periods of disappointment, pain, and loss. Fun is the magical balm that makes the slings and arrows bearable.”

 



 

2. Interesting Perspective - Slow Change

Change can happen quickly, but more often, it occurs slowly after percolation and transition. During a recent talk, Todd Henry, author, speaker, and creative thinker, described “how ideas tend to come in seasons, not moments.” He started to say, “there is a slow emergence.” Instead, he accidentally combined the words and said, “there is a slowmergence.” A new phrase was born.

Todd further described slowmergence and said, “We tend to think that ideas are sudden clicks, or a-ha’s, but they more often emerge as networks and patterns over time until one inciting incident illuminates what’s been developing for days or weeks.”

I often see this with my clients when they are seeking change. While it might appear as if a change is happening suddenly, it usually has been simmering for a long time. There can be an “inciting incident,” as Todd mentions, that brings clarity and action.



Fun is the magical balm that makes the slings and arrows bearable.
— Mike Rucker, Ph.D.



3. Interesting Film – Navigate Change

Recently, I had the joy of privately screening Kate Schermerhorn’s incredible award-winning documentary film, Do I Need This? The film is about “American excess and the stuff from which happiness is truly made.” While the stats are compelling, with American homes containing an average of 300,000 objects, or 93% of Americans using their garages for storage, this film explores so much more.

Kate shares about the environmental impact of our stuff while weaving in her family’s story and personal experiences of acquiring and letting go. These themes are supported by interviews including the leading expert in Hoarding Disorder, Dr. Randy Frost, Plentitude author and economist Juliet Schor, and artists and environmental activists Judith Selby Lang and Richard Lang.

Change is another theme in the film. We witness shifts in relationships with people and their stuff. Dr. Frost recognizes how “possessions often have an essence for us.”  That “essence” can make it challenging to release. Kate said, “I just want to hold onto the past while simultaneously letting go.” This film is an honest, beautiful journey about openings for change and the impact of stuff on our lives and the planet.





 

4. Interesting Product – Easy Change

There are times while going through a change when you wish it were “easy” or “done already.” There’s nothing like adding some humor to a stressful situation. Knock Knock has a great way of infusing playfulness into their organizing products.

The I Just Want It All pad brings whimsy and order to task and change management. You can select the options quoted above along with the third choice, “dipped in chocolate,” and then list your things to do below. The bottom of the pad asks, “Is that so wrong?” I think not. Change can be challenging, but with this list, you’ll be able to focus with a smile.

 

 

5. Interesting Thought – Accept Change

Change can be messy and challenging. It involves doing new things, altering habits, reframing perspectives, and stepping outside your comfort zone. You will make mistakes, experience adversity, feel vulnerable, practice new skills, and test your patience. It’s normal to have some “oops” moments along the way. In fact, it’s a great sign which is a change indicator. Embrace the mistakes. They will bring growth, learning, and the changes you seek.

 

Do you have an interesting change discovery? Which of these resonates with you? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
How Change Becomes Something Desirable When Your Full Mind is Suddenly Aware

Have you ever ignored the signs that it’s time to make a change? Then something significant happens. What was invisible moments ago becomes something you can no longer ignore. You might wonder, “How did I not see this before?”

It’s often the case that we conveniently ignore the signs. Why is that? Change can be scary. Its pursuit can require you to do uncomfortable things, like creating new habits or stepping outside your expertise or comfort zone. Instead of embracing change as a positive, proactive choice, we meet it with hesitation or fear.

Recently, I had an experience that made me think, “How did I not see this before?” I was going about my morning routine. I just applied my face moisturizer, looked in the makeup mirror, and was about to tweeze my eyebrows. Then I saw it. In the middle of my forehead, sticking out, was one long, white coarse hair. What? It wasn’t there yesterday or the day before. Did it grow overnight? How did that happen? Or had it been there for days, and I hadn’t noticed it? Well, I saw it that morning and quickly plucked it out.

Are you wondering how this relates to change? Once I saw the hair, I couldn’t unsee it, and I felt compelled to do something. Yes. Pulling it out was making a change of sorts. While my story might seem silly, it highlights how awareness drives change.

Are these scenarios more familiar?

  • Papers are piling up on the coffee table. You walk by them every day without giving them much thought. One evening, you wonder how the piles got so big. You can no longer pass them by, so you edit, let go and regain your surface. Your awareness drove change.

  • Clothes are overflowing in your closet. You navigate each morning irritably as you get dressed. One day, you recognize how much stress this causes you. You can no longer ignore it, so you edit and organize, which creates a smoother morning routine. Your awareness drove change.

  • Your computer is slow. It crashes, takes time to respond, and doesn’t function well. Each day you continue to work with a slow, unpredictable computer. At a point, you recognize this isn’t a tolerable way forward. You spend countless hours with tech support, hire a tech person for more help, and ultimately purchase a new computer because your hard drive is failing. Why did you ignore the signs for so long? Finally, awareness drove change. If you’re curious, that was me and I love my new computer.

 

Awareness drives change.
— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVOP™

The other side of change is a wonderful place to be. But getting there can be slow when we ignore the cues. Once you ‘see’ and acknowledge the challenge, your mind creates space for finding solutions and taking action. While the initial noticing and awareness can be painful, as in “How did I not see this before?” don’t let that derail what happens next. Use your awareness as the impetus to embrace change. Once you see clearly, you have an opportunity for improvement.

Have you ever experienced a sudden awareness of a challenge that helped you make a change? Or do you have the understanding but are stuck moving forward? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

 
What's the Value of Enlisting Help As You Make a Positive Change?

Have you ever tried to build a new habit, make a change in your life, or learn something new? Think of one of those times. Did you go it alone? Or did you have help and support? For most of us, when we’re doing something outside our skill set or comfort zone, reaching out for help is the secret sauce for success.

You might remember that I set a big goal to create a healthier lifestyle almost a year ago. My main objectives were to change my eating habits, exercise more, and lose weight. Could I have done this without help? Definitely not! My husband, family, friends, and Noom coaches and lessons provide support. I’m still working on my goals, and I’ve made significant progress. I’m 25 pounds lighter, feel better physically, and am more flexible and energetic.

The ‘Noom lessons’ help me tremendously. The app sends me daily articles that deep dive into the psychology of weight loss, provide encouragement, include practical advice, and describe ways to maintain a healthy lifestyle. One piece of Noom’s wisdom that resonated with me was “Practice makes progress.”

Notice it doesn’t say ‘practice makes perfect,’ a familiar phrase. Because what or who is perfect?

I love how the practice-makes-progress concept encourages experimentation and ongoing action. Practice infers something you are working on and supports a growth mindset. It allows space for success, failure, and learning. Progress inspires incremental change.

Practice makes progress.
— Noom

I recognize how instrumental enlisting help is for achieving my goals. My organizing clients also experience these benefits. I love being on their support team.

Some ways I help my virtual organizing clients are to:

  • Define realistic goals

  • Experiment with new habits

  • Declutter and organize their things, thoughts, time, and space

  • Create maintainable organizing systems

  • Integrate accountability

  • Reflect on the changes they are making

  • Navigate overwhelm, backsliding, frustration, and discovery

  • Celebrate their progress and success

We focus on small, consistent, gradual change. My clients practice new habits, experiment with organizing systems, shift their perspective, and make progress. It’s genuinely inspiring to see their positive changes.

What changes are you actively working on? Do you have help? Do you need help? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.