What does spaciousness mean to you? When our minds, rooms, and schedules are cluttered and overflowing with thoughts, stuff, and obligations, it can be challenging to find expansiveness. As humans, having spaciousness, in whatever form it appears, can be beneficial. You will experience less stress, improved mental well-being, greater creativity and productivity, and improved accessibility. What if you had more spaciousness in your life?

This morning, my guided mindfulness meditation practice reinforced my need for open expanses during the week. While I do well with a schedule, I also crave moments when I’m not on the clock. Yesterday was one of those days. Sure, it was the weekend, when days can be more open, although we often are busy doing things. However, yesterday was my birthday.

My husband Steve and I took the day off to play and suspended doing any work or house stuff. I can’t tell you how much I appreciated and enjoyed having a day like that. We had a loose plan. We walked along the Hudson River, ate at one of my favorite Italian restaurants, and saw a movie.

Space to Enjoy The Moments

There was no rushing. We enjoyed each thing until we were ready to move on. We had plenty of time to be present with what we were doing and each other. I also had space to soak in all the loving birthday messages from family and friends.

Happier Hour author Cassie Holmes, Ph.D., said, “The mosaic you create is the magnificent life you get to live.” What will you include in your artwork? What will you release?

“The mosaic you create is the magnificent life you get to live.”

— Cassie Holmes Ph.D.

The Value of Spaciousness

Why is any of this important? Being intentional about creating space will help you enjoy and appreciate life more. Consider how adding more white space will make the holiday season more enjoyable and less stressful. Whether you are hosting, going to gatherings, traveling, or staying put, spaciousness is your friend. What would it be like to have uncluttered spaces, clarity of thought, and time for what’s most important to you?   

This week, I invite you to clear some clutter, do a brain dump, or block out unscheduled space in your schedule. What will be possible when you eliminate rushing? What will become possible when you clear the landscape within and without?

I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

As the holiday season arrives, there is much to be grateful for. There are gatherings and celebrations to look forward to with your favorite humans. There are moments of simple ordinary joy like taking your first sip of hot coffee in the morning, crossing off a task from your to-do list, or receiving an encouraging message from a friend. When things are going well, gratitude comes easily, and you lean into those positive feelings. What happens when you experience unpleasantness, inconveniences, or heartbreak? Are you able to navigate with compassion and patience?

I’m having a terrible moment, although I recognize it’s fixable and will pass. My computer is giving me BIG trouble. Yes. I talked with tech support and am working on the problem. There’s more to do, but I guess it’s time to replace my computer. This is not something I want to do right now, but it’s also no fun having my computer crash continually, go as slow as molasses, and not be able to handle the work I do each day. Time, the most precious commodity, is being wasted. My frustration levels are increasing.

During the educational NERCPO conference this weekend, presenter Rubina Motta spoke about productivity and eliminating waste in your processes. She said waste is “anything that adds cost or time without adding value.” Was she talking to me? Rubina explained the “seven deadly wastes,” of which “waiting” was one of them. I understand how waiting is essential and unavoidable at times. However, waiting for my computer programs to load while the multicolored wheel spins or reboots because the computer froze again, I could do without.

There’s a quote by author L.R. Knost, who shares a perspective about life that is both realistic and hopeful. She said,

“Life is amazing. And then it’s awful. And then it’s amazing again. And in between the amazing and awful it’s ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That’s just living heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it’s breathtakingly beautiful.”

“Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. ”

— L.R. Knost

I love Knost’s advice, which I’m going to follow right now.

I will breathe in the amazing as I . . .

• Marvel at the deep rich red maple leaves dotting the fall landscape

• Spend time with my loved ones

• Walk along the river and in the woods

• Enjoy the flavors, textures, and scents of the foods I eat

• Hear music that makes me well up with emotion

• What amazing things will you breathe in?

I will hold on through the awful as I . . .

• Figure out what tech steps are needed next

• Grieve for the family and friends who have passed

• What awful things are you navigating?

I will relax and exhale during the ordinary as I . . .

• Do my daily mindfulness meditation

• Practice yoga

• Journal

• Brush my teeth

• Shower

• Organize my days

• Get into bed at night

• What ordinary things are you relaxing into?

Life is a mix of emotions, experiences, joy, heartbreak, and more. Some days are more challenging than others. Extend extra compassion to yourself as you navigate life’s ups and downs. Breathe, hold on, and relax through all that is before you. What are you noticing now? What is your time and attention feeding? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Mindfulness strengthens awareness, which filters into all aspects of life. Mindfulness can influence how you approach moment-to-moment experiences, your choices, and how intentional (or not) you are. Bringing a mindful approach to people, places, and things enhances your wellbeing.

Intertwined with mindfulness is a question that my good friend and life coach, Yota Schneider, offered recently. I first heard her question during a retreat she facilitated. Yota also wrote about it in her recent blog post, The Power of the Questions We Ask Ourselves. So what is this profound question? She asked, “Is it necessary?”

I love how the query brings mindful attention and focus to your thinking. The question cuts through the noise and is universally applicable. It allows for a gentle opening, which creates a path for positive, intentional choices. Many things in life are unnecessary, like unhelpful thoughts, physical stuff that blocks your space, calendar clutter, or relationships that drain rather than energize you.

The beauty of Yota’s question also encourages you to also answer the opposite one; What is necessary? When you let go of the unessential, unproductive, and damaging stuff, you create room for remarkable possibilities and a life filled with the things you purposefully choose.

“Is it necessary?”

— Yota Schneider

Going back to Yota’s retreat, she guided us in a group meditation with the “Is it necessary?” prompt. After, we wrote about what surfaced during our practice. Below is a personal journal entry from that experience where I reflected on “necessary.”

Linda’s Journal Entry

Is it necessary? Breathing? Most definitely necessary. Resting? Yes, yes, and yes! Having quiet? Not always, but sometimes like tonight, so needed and lovely. As I relaxed in the silence of the meditation, I drifted and then floated. Where did I go? It was a still, peaceful, calm place. No demands on myself or the time. A feeling of being. I might have drifted off here or there. When I returned, my awareness was of stillness- no sound or sensations, no attention to my breath. It felt necessary. Needed. So needed.

What isn’t necessary? The negative self-talk, doubt, and feeling of not knowing what to do next. When I’m in ‘focus mode,’ doubt generally recedes. I feel the momentum and motivation to move towards that thing, goal, or destination. I’m on the journey, a path of discovery and action.

But when the wind changes, and it does, I head in the not necessary direction. The breeze took me there today for a portion of my day. The plan for the day veered off course, and so did my thoughts- the unnecessary, unhelpful ones.

Slowly, after two good walks, a few meals, and snacks, I willed myself back. I let go of the doubt or suspended it long enough to take one step. That led to another and back to where I wanted to be. Is it necessary to course correct? Sometimes it is because it’s impossible to be at 100% capacity 100% of the time.

Is it necessary? Breathing? Yes. Resting? Yes. Making a distinction between the essential and not necessary? A resounding yes!

How does mindfulness influence your decision-making? When you think about the choices before you, will you use the question- Is it necessary? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Life encompasses an array of emotions. We experience joy, sadness, fear, anger, surprise, love, and many nuanced emotions. We can change our state of being by altering our actions, breath, or thoughts. Switching gears amid powerful emotions can be challenging. However, it’s possible. Bringing mindful awareness to what you’re feeling and doing is one path to get there. With that awareness, opportunities to experience more happiness will increase.

When you live in the land of ‘wishing,’ you’re focused on someday. While it’s essential to dream and future-think, this can detract from current experiences. You can miss opportunities for happiness and mindful moments if you’re too intent on what will be versus what is going on now.

I’m a quote collector. I have several favorites on my desk, including one from Walt Whitman. His thoughts beautifully weave a connection between happiness and mindfulness. He said, “Happiness, not in another place but this place…not for another hour, but this hour.”

What does Whitman’s message encourage? It reminds me that happiness is always available to us. You don’t need to postpone joy for some future time when your project is complete, or goals are reached. It’s possible to experience happiness as part of your daily journey. Develop a mindful awareness of what is happening now and what senses you are noticing.

“Happiness, not in another place but this place...not for another hour, but this hour.”

— Walt Whitman

Which recent experiences made you happy? Here are a few of mine:

• Seeing the bouquet of yellow-orange flowers in the purple vase

• Feeling the cooler fall air on my skin

• Smelling the pine-scented sachet in my dresser drawer

• Eating a delicious frozen dark chocolate dipped banana pop

• Hearing the sound of my husband’s voice on the other end of the phone

• Picking fresh basil from my mini-garden for my salad

• Walking along the Hudson River

• Folding the clean laundry

• Taking a yoga class

• Sweeping the front path

• Learning from Nest Advisor colleagues

• Watching the birds enjoy the birdbath in our backyard

• Engaging in deep conversations with my friends, family, clients, and colleagues

• Creating images and a promo video for my upcoming clutter workshop

Tiny happiness moments are accessible and can be enhanced when you pause to savor them. What are you noticing? How do mindfulness and happiness show up in your life? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.