What happens when you have so many possibilities? Do you feel overwhelmed? Do you get stuck? Are you unable to make decisions or take action? It’s terrific to have options and know there are lots of possibilities. However, when the scope is too large, the choices can feel more like a burden than an inspiration.

Last week, I attended the ICD conference near Boston with over 100 organizing colleagues from around the globe. It felt amazing to be together in person again, be with my colleagues, and meet new friends. We learned from incredible experts during seven 90-minute sessions. It was wonderful, intense, and emotional. There were sessions about dementia, hoarding, neurodiversity, ADHD, anxiety, time management, and mindset.

By the end, my brain felt drippy, like a sponge that couldn’t absorb more liquid. Of course, I want to share everything I learned with you. As I sat to write this, I got overwhelmed by the options and possibilities. So, guess what? I’m dialing it back from my 16 pages of notes to share information from five of the sessions. I hope the ideas open up something for you- a new perspective, reframe, or possibility.

5 Powerful Ways Learning Encourages Possibilities

1. DEMENTIA | “I am who I am. I’m just different.”

Beth Nolan, PhD, the Director of Research and Policy for Teepa Snow’s Positive Approach to Care™ (PAC), said there are 100+ causes and types of dementia. One way to help is to understand while dementia “robs” the person of many things, they still have skills and strengths. Identify and focus on those.

My mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia in 2013 and passed away in 2021. While many of her abilities were compromised over those eight years, I was always inspired by what remained, like her ability to make music, play the piano, sing, and express love. She was still my mom, just different.

2. HOARDING | “Hoarding isn’t just a house problem. It’s a mental health problem.”

Dr. David Tolin, the Founder and Director of the Anxiety Disorders Center at the Institute for Living and Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine, said Hoarding Disorder became a standalone diagnosis in the 2013 DSM-5. The hallmarks of the disorder are having difficulty discarding or parting with possessions and having a visible manifestation of clutter build up with the home no longer useable for its intended purpose.

For people with Hoarding Disorder, “Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

Dr. Tolin shared these statistics:

• The drive to acquire and save affects 2-5% of the population worldwide.

• Hoarding Disorder is twice as common as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

• Hoarding Disorder begins at a young age (6-16) and worsens with age. It does not get better on its own.

While Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is one of the most successful treatment methods for Hoarding Disorder, it is not 100% effective. Through continuing research, Dr. Tolin is committed to better understanding the psychology and biology of hoarding behavior and discovering ways to boost CBT’s efficacy.

“Saving happens because tossing is distressing, not liberating or freeing.”

— Dr. David Tolin

3. NEURODIVERSITY | “The value of life can’t and shouldn’t be based on productivity. It leaves a lot of people out.”

Devon Price, PhD, a social psychologist, professor, researcher, author, and proud Autistic person, was diagnosed with autism after finishing his PhD and experiencing “autistic burnout.”

Some of autism’s distinguishing characteristics include sensory input challenges, such as loud sounds and eye contact, which are painful. Processing is slower, but it’s a strength because they catch small details and are more detail-oriented. However, because the world moves fast, it doesn’t support how they process, so they feel more disabled.

Devon prefers identity-first language- “autistic person,” “autistic,” and “disabled person.” He said to avoid “differently abled” or “special needs.”

4. ADHD | “Successful ADHD women look successful on the outside and feel inadequate on the inside.”

Linda Roggli, PCC, creator of the ADHD Palooza series, a Professional Certified Coach, and author and founder of the A-D-Diva Network for ADHD women 40-and-better said she has an “ADHD brain.” 

The ADHD inattentive type is most prevalent in women. Some distinguishing factors include a busy brain, low energy, high worry, inability to concentrate, being distracted by one’s thoughts, daydreaming, difficulty following through and prioritizing, misplacing things, being talkative, impatient, having low self-esteem, not having great a working memory, making impulsive decisions, and feeling restless.

Roggli said understanding the impact of hormones on women with ADHD is essential. The brain works better with more estrogen. Estrogen affects dopamine. The ADHD brain lacks dopamine. Menopause decreases estrogen by 50% and keeps getting lower.

Most women with ADHD have comorbid conditions or “sidecars.” They include:

• 30-40% - 1 Depressive episode

• 50% - Learning differences

• 10-20% Bipolar

• 30% OCD

• Up to 50% - Addictions

5. ANXIETY | “The more you care, the more you worry. Anxiety means I care. You can’t teach people not to care. You can only teach how to manage anxiety.”

Dr. Alicia Clark, a psychologist and author of Hack Your Anxiety, said 40% of people experience persistent stress, and only 36% get help. She also said:

• Women suffer from anxiety 1.6 times more than men.

• Post-pandemic, anxiety and depression increased by three times.

• The visual distraction of clutter increases cognitive overload and decreases working memory.

Anxiety shows up in the “emotional landscape” of the organizing work we do with our clients. These can appear as fear of change, failure, facing emotional memory of things, letting go, and making mistakes.

Dr. Clark described four forms of anxiety – Whisper, Chatter, Nagging, and Yelling. She explained they are not all bad. Chatter anxiety is referred to as “good stress.” You can reframe anxiety and recognize that it drives motivation. She suggests using “anxiety to change what is in your control,” focusing on progress, reframing setbacks as part of the growth process, and getting adequate sleep.

Possibilities open up when we understand more about our psychological, emotional, and biological states. I was deeply moved by the presenters, the stories and insights they shared, and how they connected to many of my clients. It is a privilege to be part of their journey. I have the utmost respect and admiration for my clients’ determination and how they face their challenges.

What possibilities appeared for you? Did you discover any surprises? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D.

It’s time again to share our popular “Ask the Expert” interview series that connects you with dynamic thought leaders. This year we’ve spoken with Harold Taylor about time management, Erin Rooney Doland about clutter, Francine Jay about letting go, Todd Henry about next steps, Dr. Debbie Grove about change, and Joshua Becker about fresh starts. For July, I’m excited to have with us prolific author, speaker, and learning and human development expert, Dr. Thomas Armstrong to share his insights about motivation.

I had the pleasure of meeting Thomas almost two years ago when he spoke about Neurodiversity at the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD) conference in Denver. He’s a fabulous presenter who is knowledgeable and engaging. My gratitude goes to Thomas for taking the time from his busy travel schedule to join us. When we communicated this past spring, he was just returning from being away for a month lecturing in Abu Dhabi. Before we begin, here’s more about him.

Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D. is the Executive Director of the American Institute for Learning and Human Development, an award-winning author and speaker, and an educator for forty years. Over one million copies of his books are in print on issues related to learning and human development. He’s written fifteen books including The Myth of the A.D.D. Child and 7 Kinds of Smart. Dr. Armstrong has given over 900 keynotes and workshops in 44 states and 23 countries. You can connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, blog or website.

Linda Samuels:How has your expertise in neurodiversity and multiple intelligences influenced your ideas about motivation?

Thomas Armstrong, Ph.D.:  It’s clear to me that students are much more likely to be motivated to learn if they have an opportunity to learn using their most highly developed and/or most highly preferred intelligences.  Similarly, if a student has special needs (LD, ADHD, Autism etc.), they are more likely to be motivated in school if they are helped to learn using their strengths, rather than their weaknesses.  By focusing on words and numbers in the schools (rather than pictures, the body, music, nature etc.), we’re cutting off natural motivational channels for many kids.  And by employing a deficit orientation for kids with special needs, rather than a diversity perspective, we’re making it harder for these kids to get motivated.

Linda:  What motivates us to change?

Thomas: I’ve always liked Abraham Maslow’s schema on motivation, which he shared in the chapter ‘’Defense and Growth’’ in his book Toward a Psychology of Being.  He says you become motivated to change when a) you minimize the dangers of making a change, b) you maximize the dangers of not changing; c) you maximize the advantages of making a change, d) you minimize the advantages of not changing.  It’s a simple, elegant formula that anyone can use to develop a willingness to take a new job, exercise, not smoke, learn a new language, enter a new relationship, and so forth.

Linda:  What is one common motivation obstacle and a strategy for overcoming it?

Thomas:  Fear or anxiety seems to me to be the primary hurdle. There are many good strategies for overcoming fear/anxiety including meditation, strenuous exercise, psychotherapy, progressive relaxation, visualization, and yoga, just to name a few. I’ve used all of them, and to good effect.

Linda:  What has been your biggest personal motivation challenge?

Thomas: I’d prefer not to dig that deep into my past, but one very big personal challenge for me in the past several years has been my desire to write a novel.  I started sketching notes for a novel in 1990, began in earnest on it in the early 2000’s, and have been working intermittently on it ever since.  I’ve had to confront my own self-doubts about my ability to write fiction, my own difficulty in moving over from my left hemisphere (non-fiction) to my right hemisphere (novel), and my general difficulty in facing an empty page and moving into the unknown. I’m happy to report that I completed the first rough draft of my 120,000-word novel just last month while I was working in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates. I celebrated by having lunch at Hemingway’s, a restaurant at the hotel dedicated to one of America’s greatest novelists.  Now, on to the revisions!

Linda:  What is your most surprising discovery about motivation?

Thomas: That you have to keep on re-motivating yourself. Motivation is not just one long surge. At least for me, it comes in spurts, and in different ways, and I guess, surprisingly for me, through dreams (which really helped motivate me to write my novel).

Linda:  What else would you like to add?

Thomas: So many parents ask:  how can I motivate my child to learn?  This is the wrong question. Your child was born with a natural motivation to learn, otherwise our species would have gone extinct. The question is, how do we re-motivate our kids, how do we reconnect them back to that intrinsic love of learning that they were born with. Here’s a hint:  tests, grades, ‘’rigorous’’ and demanding coursework, labeling, tracking, a standardized curriculum – these are not the ways!

Thomas, I love the positive, strengths-based approach you have about motivation and learning. Working from a place that energizes us makes so much sense whether we’re a child or an adult. Thank you also for highlighting Abraham Maslow’s model on motivation and change. Those ideas along with the strategies you shared for overcoming motivation obstacles are so helpful. I’m sure they’ll resonate with my readers.

Please join Thomas and me as we continue the conversation. Share your ideas about motivation, strengths-based being, and change. What are your thoughts?