One of my obsessions, which you might not know about, is “tiny houses” and the tiny house movement. I am in awe of living with less (less space, less stuff) and how small spaces are designed. I love watching the Netflix show, Tiny House Nation, adding images to my Oh, So Tiny Houses! Pinterest board, and reading about people living the tiny house lifestyle. My fantasy is to sell our home (and most of our stuff) and move into a tiny house.

My husband, Steve, doesn’t share my enthusiasm for this idea. He has expressed many times, “I don’t want to live in a tiny house and get rid of all of my stuff. I like my stuff. Where would I put all of my signs?”  Steve is a collector of many things, including large porcelain advertising signs.  Then he clarified that if we did move into a tiny house, we’d need two of them to “keep the peace.”

In the early summer, with tiny house fantasies and vacation planning on my mind, I discovered a unique place in the Catskills. A Tiny House Resort, where we could experience firsthand what tiny home living was like. Steve was game and knew this would be fun, but also help me experience viscerally what tiny living was all about. I booked us an adorable 350 square foot little house complete with a full kitchen, bathroom with five-foot tub, space to sleep four people, fire pit, pergola, and outdoor gas grill. What fun! This family-run resort is situated along the Catskill Creek, has beautiful walking trails, a waterfall, and an outdoor heated swimming pool. There are farm animals, including goats (available for Goat Yoga,) sheep, free-range chickens laying fresh eggs that guests can have, vegetable and herb garden to pick from, giant-sized (not tiny) outdoor chess, and checkers, and so much more.

Four Tiny House Life Lessons

Life Lesson One: Defining Too Cozy

My ah-ha moment came when I approached our tiny house, opened the door, and walked in. I knew in an instant that I could never live full-time in one. Why? It was too small. I told Steve, and he smiled- well, maybe he belly laughed. While it was fantastic spending a long weekend there with him in this cozy and unique space, it is not how I want to live all the time. Although we both agreed that we could if we had to.

Life Lesson Two: Not So Small Afterall

The second ah-ha came when we returned back to our own home, which we’ve always called “small.” Our home felt spacious after four days of living in the tiny house. This realization reinforced that my tiny house fantasy is just that- a fantasy. I am happy and deeply grateful to live in our rightly sized home. I felt very much like Goldilocks when she sat in the “just right” chair. I discovered that our house is “just right” for us.

“I want to prioritize being and doing over acquiring and managing. ”

— Linda Samuels, CPO-CD®, CVPO™

Life Lesson Three: Live With Less

I also recognized that even though I no longer aspire to live in a tiny home, which is defined as between 100 to 400 square feet, I am interested in living with less. It was so apparent how little we needed when we stayed at the tiny house resort. Instead of 30 drinking glasses, there were four. Instead of silverware for 40, there were 4 spoons, forks, and knives. We had just enough, but not more than enough. It felt liberating. 

So when I returned home, I started to not just think about editing my stuff. I actually began letting go. A bag of books was filled and donated to the library. I went through my files and filled up three large bags of paper to recycle and shred. That’s just the beginning. My plan is to go through each room and find things that no longer have value, are taking up space, or have overstayed their welcome. 

I don’t feel pressure or have a specific timeframe for doing this. It will be a relaxed and ongoing process.

Life Lesson Four: Clarifying My Why

Our tiny house experience inspired me not to move but to discover what living with just enough feels like. I’m hyperaware of the 80/20 rule and frequently share this with clients. We only refer to 20% of the papers we file, wear 20% of the clothes we own, read or refer to 20% of the books on our shelves, use 20% of the kitchen gadgets, and so on. I want to review and potentially let go of close to 80% of the things I never use, access, or need. I recognize this is ambitious, but I am open to the process. Why should the stuff I collected and don’t use take up valuable physical real estate and emotional energy? Why should I leave the things I no longer want for our kids to have to sort through when I’m gone? I acquired these things. It’s my responsibility to decide their future.

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, our tiny living weekend allowed us the freedom to live and not spend much time caring for the physical stuff of life. Less time cleaning and decision-making meant more time for kayaking, walking in the Catskill Creek, hanging out by the waterfall, swimming, picking peppers and basil from the garden, preparing and eating meals together, and enjoying our time together. Yes. I get that we were on vacation. But even so, going forward, I want to prioritize being and doing over acquiring and managing. We only go around once. 

Have you considered tiny house living? If so, do you need help editing? Do you feel overwhelmed by your things, or do you have just enough? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.

What is your most surprising discovery about letting go? I asked several of my wonderful colleagues (Elisa Macomber, Deb Lee, Yota Schneider, Ellen Delap, Randi Lyman, Cena Block, Janine Adams, Diane Quintana, Nancy Borg, Grant Willcox) to ponder this question and share their thoughts with us. Their responses are filled with ah-has, courage, and hope. My gratitude goes to each of them for taking the time to reflect, and give us their insightful, encouraging words of wisdom. If you are struggling to let go, perhaps you will discover a nugget here to help you move forward.

What is your most surprising discovery about letting go? . . .

1. Relinquish Fear

“Letting go of something, whether it's an old item, a negative belief, or an ex-flame, requires getting past the fear that there will be nothing to replace that void. But I've learned over the years that once we let go of what no longer suits us, something greater and better awaits us. I have often found myself chuckling why I didn't let go sooner or what was I so afraid of? That is the beautiful trick  - to keep our eyes to what lies ahead of us, coming right at us, to enrich our lives for the better.”

Elisa Macomber, Placement Designer & Blogger

2. Acknowledge Paradox

“Sometimes, the things I expect will be difficult to let go of are actually very easy to part with. And, the things that are not that meaningful make me question whether or not I really should give them up. It’s an interesting and surprising paradox, but, thankfully, thinking about the feeling of freedom I’ll have once I let go gets me through it.”

Deb Lee, CPO^®, Certified Professional Organizer^®, Blogger & App Addict

3. Expand Learning

“I’ve had a wealth of opportunities to practice holding on and letting go. I know the feeling of having crossed the desert only to find an oasis of renewed energy and enthusiasm for my life. I’ve experienced the healing sense of relief and expansion that comes with letting go what doesn’t work for me anymore. Yet, I can still get blindsided by denial. Others can see what I need to let go of but not me. How can that be? Maybe expecting an end to the process of learning is what I need to let go of."

Yota Schneider, Life Transitions Coach 

4. Welcome Possibilities

“Letting go empowers you to take a bold step forward and permit new opportunities to come to you. Almost immediately your next connection will come into being because you are open to new possibilities. Why not let go today of what is complete and make yourself available to what is fresh and new?”

Ellen Delap, CPO^®, Certified Family Manager Coach

5. Change Perspective

“I made a conscience effort to quit a habit that didn't serve my current lifestyle. Once I realized that the habit was gone for good, I felt as if hundreds of pounds had been lifted from me. Now that I was free from that habit, there was space in my life for something new. This created a welcomed sense of accomplishment, inner strength and self-determination.”

Randi Lyman, CPO-CD^®, Professional Organizer

6. Activate Courage

“Letting go is much easier to do, than it is to think about doing. Letting go has everything to do with trust and courage. As I’ve clarified my path in life and business, I have much less fear, worry, or concern about letting go. As I’ve learned to let go, my path has become clearer, my work more effortless, and results more tangible.  Letting go is a transformation that takes place despite your worry – and is a result of doing the very thing you worry about.”

Cena Block, Mompreneur Mentor, Speaker & Author

7. Experience Freedom

“That letting go of objects can be so freeing. When I declutter, I open up myself to new possibilities. Even when it’s been hard to make the decision to let an item go, I’m almost always filled with good feelings once it has been donated – it’s very rare for me to feel even a twinge of regret. I wish more of my clients realized this!”

Janine Adams, CPO^®, CPO-CD^®, Professional Organizer, Speaker & Blogger

8. Engage Mindfulness

“I was amazed and delighted to discover that by letting go of a pre-conceived notion I was free to make remarkable progress toward a long-term goal I had. Prior to letting go, I had not been aware that a part of my subconscious continued to be occupied with this preconceived notion even though I was actively working toward my goal. Letting go of this notion allowed me the space to breathe and to be fully engaged in the work I needed to do to attain my goal; to be totally mindfully present.”

Diane Quintana, CPO-CD^®, CPO^®, Professional Organizer, Speaker & Blogger

9. Prioritize Treasures

“My personal experience of moving 33 years of ‘life stuff’ sheds interesting light on ‘letting go.’  We all move somewhere at sometime in our lives, and so it's an interesting exercise for anyone to think about what they'd prioritize to take along on their eventual journey. Letting go of possessions that no longer provide significant value, and virtually exist because they've been ignored, do not tug at the heartstrings as much.  I suggest letting go of what doesn't hurt first, and then find creative ways to commemorate the abundant treasures without having to keep them all.”

Nancy Borg, Professional Organizer & Blogger

10. Embrace Flow

“I've found by letting go, the things we aim for will more often than not come to us anyway, but in a delightfully unforced way. In letting go and stepping out of the 'torrent of tasks' we become re-centered, re-focused & rebalanced. There is a lot to be learned by the Chinese Proverb " Don't Push the River - It flows by itself. " It's such a graceful reminder, which inspires me to let go on a regular basis.”

Grant Willcox, Success Specialist

Which ideas resonate with you? I love the variety in these responses, which include thinking about letting go of possessions, fear, habits, and negative beliefs in order to embrace new possibilities, growth, and clarity. I’d love to hear from you. Come join the conversation and share your thoughts about letting go challenges, successes, or surprises. What are your thoughts?