What happens when you need to work, push, and get things done, yet you feel like doing the exact opposite? When needs and wants conflict, which one wins out? Are you able to let go? Do you forge ahead despite the competing feelings? Do you compromise? Do you listen to the voice that is pulling you in the ‘opposite’ direction? Does procrastination take hold?
As I’ve described before, my natural tendency is to push myself. It’s not that I’m always working. I’m not. I purposely take breaks, have work boundaries, and make time to not do. However, I can still be hard on myself. It’s this deep sense I have to continually strive and complete. It’s not necessarily a negative thing, but there are times, like now, when my usual mode of operating competes with the loss and grief I’m experiencing. My typically wider bandwidth feels much narrower these days. It is only a few weeks since my mom died, and I have less energy.
“I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed.”
I gifted myself a compromise. Instead of writing more, I’ll share a video of the places I’ve been exploring with you. I’ve enjoyed being outside in the spring air to walk, see, smell, capture, and experience its beauty and magnificence. It’s just what I needed. Seeing the Hudson Valley landscape green and burst with color again feels beautifully affirming and hopeful.
I was willing to let go of my expectations and listen to what my heart and mind needed. Quiet time with nature called. What have you let go of recently? I’d love to hear your thoughts. I invite you to join the conversation.
