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« What Are Today's Interesting Finds? - v6 | How Motivated Are You to Slow Down? »
Wednesday
Aug052015

How to Better Focus Time for iHelp and iAskforHelp

Given that it’s the era of iPhone, iPad, iThis and iThat, I thought that it would be interesting to add a few more iThings to the list. How about iHelp and iAskforhelp? These are very different, yet equally important. We tend to lean more heavily towards one “i” than the other. Which direction do you gravitate towards?

Let’s dig deeper by asking some questions.


iHelp

  • When was the last time you helped someone?
  • Was it months ago? Years ago?
  • Was it today or yesterday?
  • Were you asked to help or did you volunteer to help?
  • How often do you find yourself in the helping mode?
  • Who do you help? Do you help family, friends, colleagues, or clients?
  • What are the benefits you receive by helping others? 

iAskforhelp

  • When was the last time you asked for help?
  • Do you freely ask for help?
  • Do you feel guilty asking others for assistance?
  • Do you feel like things will get done better, faster, or more efficiently if you do them yourself?
  • When you aren’t sure about the next step, do you procrastinate or reach out for help?
  • What type of help are you most comfortable asking for? Is it for home repairs, life guidance, organizing help, or family care?
  • What type of help are you most uncomfortable asking for?
  • What prevents you from enlisting help?
  • Last time you asked for help, what was the outcome?
  • What are the benefits you receive by enlisting help?

 

While I would like to have a combination of both helping and enlisting help, I’m more often in the helping others mode between clients that are in need of organizing help, coordinating care as my mom ages in place, and my role as President for ICD.

Yet even though I’m often in the iHelp mode, I recognize the value of asking for help. It’s impossible to do everything ourselves. I’m a huge advocate of teams, especially building teams. The energy of a focused group can accomplish way more than the energy of one.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. What is your relationship to helping and enlisting help? Come join the conversation!

 

 

 

 

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Reader Comments (7)

I'm more likely to offer help than enlist help, but that could be my stage at the moment. Our relationship to "help" changes with the seasons of our lives: sometimes we give, other times we take. I think refusing to seek help when we need it can be a sign of unhealthy proud, rather than competence. I can recall being on the receiving end, and it has always been a blessing!

August 5, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSeana Turner

Seana- I love your philosophy about how our relationship to help changes at various points of our lives. That makes so much sense. Learning how to receive help, especially when you are more accustomed to being on the giving end, is really important. The way you've reframed the perspective is so useful. Thank you.

August 5, 2015 | Registered CommenterLinda Samuels

i think I help more often than I ask for help, but I'm getting better at asking.

August 5, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJanet Barclay

I'm totally iHelp. Enjoy and feel blessed anytime I can help someone. But I must say, I only help when I'm capable of doing it, if I have no time or desire I simple say it. It's the power of say no. I think in order to help we need to want it and being capable, without those two conditions, there's no way to help others without feeling forced.

On the other hand I struggle asking for help. I know I should leave my pride aside but always try to give my last effort before looking for someone to help me.

August 5, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNacho Eguiarte

@Janet- I definitely identify with you on this one. I'm in the learning, growing mode too about asking for help more.

@Nacho- Very good point about helping where you feel your skill set matches the need. That makes a lot of sense. For me, the asking for help has less to do with pride and more to do with not wanting to impose. I'm a work in progress.

August 5, 2015 | Registered CommenterLinda Samuels

I am more like to offer to help than to ask for help. I have had to ask for help in the last few weeks, and although it was hard, it was good for me mentally and physically. My mother always used to tell me, letting someone help you makes them feel good, and who doesn't want that?

August 5, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJill Robson

Jill- It's wonderful that you were able to draw from your mother's sage wisdom during the last few weeks. Like you, as someone that helps more often than asks for help, I totally understand about how good it feels to help others. So by asking for help, we give others the opportunity to feel good too.

Your comment reminded of a post I wrote a bunch of years back, "6 Reasons to Enlist Help," that you might enjoy. Here's the link:

http://theothersideoforganized.com/blog/2011/8/8/6-reasons-to-enlist-help.html

August 5, 2015 | Registered CommenterLinda Samuels

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